Every morning I get breakfast in bed.
Never mind that this is because my body doesn’t work and I look and feel like a hung-over junkie in the morning, I still feel decadent when my hot breakfast is brought in.
I am lucky and very grateful to have so much support from my family.
This morning it was Large Dad’s turn to bring me breakfast.
Me: Hmm that looks great.
Large Dad: I hope so, I think it turned out okay.
He wanders over to offer his finger to my fresh water turtle. Dexter, named after the tv serial killer, snaps with intent at the proffered finger. Something is not right.
Me: Are your pants on inside out?
Large Dad looks down, he is wearing short board shorts (evidence that Mum didn’t see him get dressed this morning) and they look a bit funny. I think I can see a frayed seam.
Large Dad: no I don’t think so.
He turns towards me.
Me: Umm, I can see your undies. (giggling)
There is a large vertical rip, down the side of his outer thigh from the bottom hem to the top hem.
I can see a lot of hairy leg and at the very top, faded blue rio undies.
Large Dad: OOps.
He looks serious for a moment considering the ripped shorts.
Large Dad: I guess I’ll have to throw these out?
Me: Yes, definitely, don’t even think about keeping them. (sheesh)
It reminds me of the time my physics teacher split his pants and tried to staple them back together. I start to giggle harder.
Then something about the way Large Dad is standing makes me suspicious,
Me: Have you been anywhere this morning?
Large Dad: No, not really, only Bunnings.
NB: Bunnings is a really really big hardware store.